Just To Hold You version 2
by Teris Xenite
Summary: Logan finds a way to overcome the virus that seperates him from Max. Chapter seven, Logan's turn.
1. Prologue

Just To Hold You 

Chapter 1 

Teris Xenite 

terisxenite@hotmail.com 

Author's Note and disclaimer: No I don't own them. If I did they'd still be able to touch (there were other ways to inject tension). I have to admit as much as I don't like it…the virus was a good one. But the shipper in me can't leave this alone…so here lies the story. Somehow I have the feeling that it will be one of many like this but hey gotta toss my two cents in (and since I updated both of my other stories in the last week I don't feel bad in doing so even though this is a first chapter). I hope you enjoy, review or no more posting shall occur (I tried not blackmailing I really did and my muse starved so). And lastly the italicized words are thoughts, the bold italicized words are a characters counter thoughts while arguing with themselves. 

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Logan sat looking at the phone. _Damn this shouldn't be this hard. All I'm doing is calling Original Cindy. **Well yeah, but it's what you're calling her about that's giving you trouble and you know it.** But I know she'll be all for it. **Well then make the call, don't just sit here.** Right._ His moment of internal debate over Logan picked up the phone and dialed. "Cindy? Yeah, hi. I need a favor. Yeah I need you to deliver something to Max for me? You will? Thanks, do you want me to drop it off at your place or do you want to stop by here and pick it up? Ok, I'll see you then." 

After he hung up Logan looked at the package that could easily change his life, again. Max had been growing more and more distant as the time went by without finding a way for them to be able to touch. _I can't lose her. We've both lost so much already. I'll be damned if I'll let Manticore take this away from us too._

The box looked innocent enough to the naked eye, but the errant Kryptonian or X-ray technician would have likely broken their jaw at the contents. Below the innocent outward wrapping lie everything that he could possibly need to show Max that although they couldn't touch they could still be intimate. _That is if she doesn't kick my ass on principal when she sees the handcuffs…_

A knock on the frame of his office door announced Cindy's arrival. "Hey, what ya got that ya need delivered to my boo? And I shoulda asked before I came, but is this a cupid type delivery or eyes business?" 

"Ah, well it's definitely of the cupid variety." 

"Good, cause as much angst as my boo is going through if it'd been business I would have had to lay a smack down on your ass." 

"And I would fully support you in that…but it's not business, it's very much personal. And I put a warning in the note for her not to open it until she was alone, but since she doesn't tend to listen to me…Could you warn her not to open it in the middle of Jam Pony or anything like that?" 

"Noted…" A moment passed as she studied him. "So how you holding up? And don't even try to lie, cause Original knows ya know." 

"Yeah Cindy I know. It's really hard. Better than thinking she was gone forever…but damn it's hard having her this close and still being so far away." 

"No doubt." 

"I'd give anything to be able to touch her, hold her. It's killing me to see her hurting and not be able to comfort her." 

"Don't I know it. But you two will beat this, or Original Cindy don't play for the all girl team. Ya just gotta stay close, and keep the faith." 

"Are the nightmares getting any better?" 

"Some, she still has them but they seem to be getting better." She didn't mention that most of Max's nightmares centered around Logan and his death these days. The terror of Manticore seemed to have faded with the inferno that destroyed it. 

He would never forget the first night Max had been back. After she'd left his place she'd gone to her apartment and woke Cindy. They had talked until both of them crashed, only to have Cindy awakened a few minutes later to find Max in the grips of a night terror. After trying everything she could think of to rouse her friend from her fear, she finally called Logan and held the phone to Max's ear as he spoke to her. After a few moments she woke, but they had be agonizing moments for all three. 

Periodically after that for the next several weeks Cindy initiated late night phone calls to Logan's penthouse. The sound of Max sobbing in fear hurt Logan more than anything else could have, save perhaps the fact that he was powerless to comfort her in the way that both of them desired above all else. Every desire, each longing now centered around one simple thing: touch. He realized that he could live the rest of his life without making love with Max. But the thought of going without being able to hold her when she cried, or take her hand or stroke her forehead during one of her seizures was killing him. 

He'd come to realize that it was the simple things he missed the most: brushing her hair back from her face, having her read over his shoulder. Innocent, simple touches that he didn't even realize that he would miss until suddenly they were gone. The loss of the closeness, the every day intimacy that they had shared hurt him more than not being able to kiss or caress her. But if his plan worked, maybe they could recapture some of that intimacy. _After all, the brain is the most sensual organ. Let's see if Lydecker was right about mind over matter._

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Hope you liked it. Review and I shall post again soon, the second chapter is already being typed ;').   
Comments can be sent to: terisxenite@hotmail.com 

  



	2. Chapter 1

Just To Hold You   
Chapter 2 

Teris Xenite 

terisxenite@hotmail.com 

Author's Note and disclaimer: No I don't own them. If I did they'd still be able to touch (there were other ways to inject tension). I have to admit as much as I don't like it…the virus was a good one. But the shipper in me can't leave this alone…so here lies the story. Somehow I have the feeling that it will be one of many like this but hey gotta toss my two cents in . I hope you enjoy, review or no more posting shall occur (I tried not blackmailing I really did and my muse starved so). And lastly the italicized words are thoughts, the bold italicized words are a characters counter thoughts while arguing with themselves. 

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Max let out a long sigh and rested her head against her locker. It had been a long day, and normally she would have gone to Logan's. But given the givens that was pretty much impossible. _Damn this is hard. As if it isn't enough to not be able to touch him, I can't even be in the same room without being scared to death I'm gonna slip up and kill him. You know if that bitch wasn't already dead..._

Original Cindy came up carrying a package. "Hey boo, hot delivery for you." 

"Great, where's this one gotta go?" 

"Straight to you from Logan." Max set forth to open it, completely ignoring the attached note. "Boo I wouldn't do that if I were you." 

"Why?" 

"Logan told me to warn you that it was personal. To the point that you might not wanna open it in front the crew." 

"Ah." 

"Yeah, it's in the note. But I guess he figured you open first and read later." 

"Well unless I wanna pull out something from one of Sketchy's fantasies I better read first and open later." Max tore open the note and leaned against the locker to read the note and Original wandered off to get another package from Normal. 

_Dear Max,_   
_When you were gone I missed you in a million ways, but no matter how dark our world gets, it's still brighter with you in it. Now that your back, I can be honest with myself, I wouldn't have lived with out you. I wouldn't have wanted to. But now that you're back, I'm faced with losing you all over again, to a crueler foe than before. For now you are always close enough to see but never touch. There is one difference this time, I couldn't fight death, though I gladly would have done so to have you back. We can fight this together, Max. I'm not willing to let you go again Max. I won't allow Manticore to steal you from me again, not a second time. We'll find a way to beat this, that I promise. But until we do know that while you can't be in my arms you're still in my heart.___

_Love always,_   
_Logan___

_P.S. There is a small box in the top of your package that's safe to open now._

Max pulled the box out and unwrapped it, when she opened it she found a cell phone and a note. _Max, press 1 when you open this. Love, Logan._

Max turned the phone on and listened to the sound of unfamiliar digits being dialed and a partial ring before his familiar voice answered. "Yes angel, you rang?" 

"How'd ya know it was me?" 

"You have a special ring love. Now what can I do for you tonight?" 

"You tell me, you're the one who planned this shindig, remember?" 

"Very true, but where it goes is entirely up too you." 

"Really?" 

"Yes really. And there's a little something special built into that phone you're holding too." 

"What's that?" 

"It diverts all calls not directly related to our safety or that of your sibs to a special holding area. The world can just stay broken tonight, because right now you're the only thing on my mind." 

"And what's going on behind those beautiful baby blues of yours? What ya thinkin about?" 

"I can't tell you that until I know where you are." 

"I'm in the Jam Pony locker room, why?" 

"Well then, I'm going to have to whisper. I wouldn't want Normal to over hear. He might want to join in and then I'd have to kill him." 

"What would he want to join in?" 

"Are you alone?" 

"For all intents and purposes, why?" 

"Cause angel, I'm gonna make you blush." 

"Really, and how do you plan on doing that?" 

"Trust me Max. I have my ways, a few of which you'll hopefully be privy to before the nights over. For now though tell me what your wearing." 

"My bike shorts and a t-shirt, why?" 

"Just wanted to know. You wanna know what I'd do right now if you were here?" He left the words and if I could unspoken, knowing that she knew that well enough for the both of them. There was a long pause, and for a moment he thought that she wasn't going to play along. 

"What would you do?" 

"I'd pull you close to me, I'd brush your hair back from your face letting my fingers slide through it, then I'd wrap my arms around you and kiss you sweet, slow and tenderly. Then I'd brush my fingertips across your cheek, and I'd slide them down to your chin, lightly tilting your chin up towards me so I could kiss you more passionately, more deeply." He paused a moment in silence, and then asked. "Can you feel it Max, can you feel how I would touch you?" 

"Dear God yes..." Max felt an ache in her lips and a corresponding throbbing of desire building at her core at his words. But her heart ached most of all, because she wanted him so very badly with everything that she was and yet still she was to be denied. "Logan, do you have any idea what you're doing to me?" 

"Yes, Max I do. But I'm not going to leave you hanging, I promise. Just trust me." 

"I do, always." There was a moment of silence as he contemplated the enormity of the gift that she had just given him. _Dear God let me do something to deserve that faith she has in me. If you grant me nothing else in this life, please don't let me let her down._

"Are you headed for home?" 

"Yes, that was the plan." _No I'm going to my apartment, and that's not home anymore. Home is where you are._ She long to say those words and several others to him but did not. 

"Alright, open the box when you get home. I'd continue with what we were doing, but I don't think even you could drive safely with those kinds of distractions. And I can't have you getting hurt, but I do want to hear your voice so why don't you tell me about your day?" 

"Well my day was long, full of bipping, and until you called pretty damn lousy. You?" 

"Wonderful. I spent the whole day thinking of you." 

"And that constitutes as wonderful? Even now?" 

"Even now Max. You make everything wonderful, just by your presence." 

Max shifted the box as she got on her bike and tried to avoid letting her emotions overwhelm her. Finally in an effort of self defense she changed the subject letting her earlier curiosity bubble to the surface. "Can't you at least give me a little clue as to what's going on?" 

"Well alright...but just one. It's going to be a lot better than what we just did." 

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Hope you liked it. Review and I shall post again soon, the third chapter is already being typed ;'). 

E-mail me off list if you like at: terisxenite@hotmail.com   
  
  
  



	3. Chapter 2

Just To Hold You 

Chapter 3 

Teris Xenite 

terisxenite@hotmail.com 

Author's Note and disclaimer: No I don't own them. If I did they'd still be able to touch (there were other ways to inject tension). I have to admit as much as I don't like it.the virus was a good one. But the shipper in me can't leave this alone.so here lies the story. Somehow I have the feeling that it will be one of many like this but hey gotta toss my two cents in (and since I updated both of my other stories in the last week I don't feel bad in doing so even though this is a first chapter). I hope you enjoy, review or no more posting shall occur (I tried not blackmailing I really did and my muse starved so). And lastly the italicized words are thoughts, the bold italicized words are a characters counter thoughts while arguing with themselves. 

**************************************************************************** ************** 

A few moments into her bike ride they discovered that they had finished with all the trivial pursuits of their respective days, and the ardor from a short time ago had paled with the distraction. It was then that Logan decided to kick things up a notch, but just one. He didn't want Max to lose her concentration to the point that she was in danger, but a little devilment wouldn't hurt. 

"So Max, are you up for a game of truth or dare?" 

"What's with you and the phone games today?" 

"Just killing time till you get home. Besides it's a great way to learn all kinds of stuff about you that you probably wouldn't tell me otherwise." 

"Turn about is still fair play right?" 

"Right." 

"In that case, shoot." 

"Truth or dare?" 

"Well since I'm in the middle of a traffic jam in Sector 4, I'm going to have to say truth." 

"What is the most romantic thing a guy has ever done for you?" 

"Well.ah the only thing that would count as romantic would be that case of motor oil Eric sent me. Sneaking into a girls crib, riffling through her things, and then leaving her a present doesn't count." 

"You mean to tell me that the most romantic thing a guy's ever done for you, excluding myself, was send you a case of motor oil on what he perceived to me the morning after?" 

"Well yeah.I normally only go after guys when I'm in heat. You're well, different." 

"Different how?" 

"As in the first relationship that didn't start with hormone induced madness." 

"I like the sound of that.And I promise you, I will definitely top that case of motor oil." 

"Somehow I don't doubt that. Now it's your turn, truth or dare?" 

"Interesting choices.and although I'd love to see what you could come up with for a dare.I'll take truth." 

"Well since we kind covered my relationship history in the last question, how many relationships have you had?" 

"Serious or other wise?" 

"Serious.although I'm curious about the otherwise too." 

"Three. Daphne, Val, and Krista." 

"Ok the first two I know, but who's Krista?" 

"My girlfriend through high school and college." 

"Really? Logan Cale, playboy of the western world only had one girlfriend through high school AND college?" 

"Yes really.I thought she was the one, until I walked in on her with my best friend." 

"Ouch." Max winced in sympathy. She remembered how much it had hurt her when Darren played her that way. _But why on Earth would any girl be stupid enough to do that to Logan? I mean me I can understand, with my female fog bank syndrome, but Logan?_

"Yeah.which led me to the otherwise, and Daphne.then Val." The pain and sadness in his voice tore at her heart. The bitch better hope I never get my hands on her, cause if I do her ass is grass. 

"Logan, I can tell you for a fact, the woman was an idiot. They all were." 

"Mm, so was Darren." 

"How'd you know about that?" 

"Cindy and I got together and cried in our beers together a couple of times. His name came up, and I went out looking for the son of a bitch." 

"And what were you gonna do if you found him?" 

"I was caught between killing him quickly so as not to allow him to continue wasting oxygen or beating him within an inch of his life and letting him suffer." 

"Funny, same thing goes through my mind every time I think about your ex's." 

"I swear Max, I'll never hurt you like that." 

_I wish I could say that.but I can't. How could I? I'm poison._ By this point and time Max was rolling her bike in her front door. "Honey, I'm home!" 

"Good now the real fun starts, where are you exactly?" 

"I'm rolling my bike through the front door." 

"When you get in follow the trail of white rose petals." 

Max looked down and saw a mixture of red and white rose petals at her feet. She dropped her bike against the wall and made her way along the trial of white petals. Her recent stay in Manticore had instilled in her a measure of paranoia, and she unconsciously carried the mysterious package under one arm and held the phone to her ear with her shoulder leaving both hands free in case she should need to defend herself. 

After a few seconds it became apparent to Max that her bathroom was the intended destination. "Logan, why is there a trail of rose petals leading to my bathroom?" 

"You'll see when you open the door." 

As Max opened the door a warm fragrant steam enveloped her. Her normally drab bath had been transformed into a sensuous paradise with soft light from a multitude of candles , lush towels, flower petals, and a warm frothy bubble bath ready and waiting just for her. She breathed in the aromatic steam, and felt the tension easing from her shoulders. "Mmm, Logan I'm impressed. This defiantly tops a case of motor oil." 

"Baby you ain't seen nothing yet. Now there is a speaker on the counter. Do me a favor plug the phone into it." 

"Alright." In less than a second Max had the phone plugged up to the speaker, and the rich tones of Logan's voice filled the small room with a warmth, an intimacy that she'd missed. 

"So now that we've handled that.let's get you into that bath before the water gets cold." He paused a moment seeming to consider how best to continue. "Truth or dare?" 

"Pardon?" 

"We never finished our game, and it's my turn. Truth or dare." 

"Decisions, decisions. Truth." Max said hoping that her voice wouldn't betray her nervousness. 

"Have you ever had phone sex before?" He hated to be so blunt, but there really was no way for a gentleman to ask such a question. 

"No." 

"Well then my love, do you know how this works?" 

"Not really, but I'm sure you'll be willing to help me fumble though it." 

"Most definitely. Alright, the first thing I want you to do is close your eyes?" 

"Ok." 

"Now listen to the sound of my voice and imagine I'm there with you. As I tell you how I would touch you I want you to touch yourself and pretend that your hands are mine." 

"Alright." Max had never imagined herself doing something like this. She'd always thought of phone sex as something dirty and twisted, but then she'd never imagined falling in love either. 

"Are you ready?" 

"Yeah." 

"If I were there with you the first thing I would do is pull you close to me, and kiss you. I would press my lips against yours very softly at first, then I would cradle your head in one hand running my fingers through your hair and massaging your scalp. With the other I'd caress your cheek and tilt your mouth closer to mine. I'd run my tongue over your lips slowly, until you opened your mouth to me." 

A small hitch in her breathing picked up by the sensitive mike let him know that she was beginning to get into the game. "I slide over your teeth and across your tongue. Then I'd slide my finger slowly across your chin and down your neck, stopping for a moment at your pulse. I can feel it start to pound as our kisses become more passionate." 

Max's hand had unconsciously drifted along her chin as Logan spoke and now rested at her hammering pulse. How could this man affect her so with only words? As he spoke her heart beat harder, her breathing became quicker, and the temperature in the room went up at least fifteen degrees. Her every day fears and concerns faded away like a mist at dawn. All cares were gone from her mind as her world narrowed to encompass only the sound of his voice and the feelings that it inspired in her. 

Max hadn't spoken since his instructions had began, but Logan could tell that he was having an effect on her by the rapid increase in her breathing. "Then I'd slide my fingers between your breasts and down to your stomach. I take both hands and slide them under the hem of your shirt, and slowly side my hands up, inching your up and over your head taking the time to enjoy touching you. I kiss your neck and jaw, then rest my lips against your cheek. Your skin is so soft Max, I love touching you." 

Her hands had ceased to be her own as she became lost in the fantasy he created. Her perfect memory allowed her to recreate every sensation, from the spicy scent of his after shave to the brush of stubble across her skin, and the heated perfection of his body entwined with hers. His voice had a hypnotic effect on her and she found her self wishing that he would cease this tender torture, completing the dance of suppressed desire, that they had been entangled in since they met. 

"Then I kiss you very slowly, tenderly as I slide my hands across your back. My fingers find the clasp of your bra, and as we kiss I unfasten it. I step away and slide my hands along your arms as I remove it, then I cup your breasts caressing them gently and brushing my fingers ever so lightly against your nipples." 

A faint blush had spread over her cheeks and with each beat of her heart inched further down along her breast bone. Soft mewling noises had began emerging from her throat, and at his last words her nipples had instantly hardened. "I kiss you again, holding you close to me. I slide my hands over your back again this time dipping lower. I take the waistband of your shorts in hand and slowly slide them down your legs caressing the inside of your thighs as I do." 

Logan was enjoying this more than he ever would have dreamed. While it wasn't the conventional foreplay that he'd imagined participating in with Max, it did provide the satisfaction of discovering that the mere sound of his voice could turn her on. But this was merely foreplay, if she was getting this excited this early in the game he couldn't wait until the finale. He made a mental note to make Max scream as well as blush before the night was over. 

"I follow your shorts to the floor, and place soft kisses starting at your knees and working my way up to that tiny little scrap of nothing that you call under ware." At any other time Max would have blushed at the insinuation that he had indeed noticed her under wear on the occasions that he'd done her laundry, but at the moment she was adrift on a sea of warm lassitude and increasing desire. 

"I can feel your heat Max, and your scent is driving me crazy. I can't wait to taste you. I bring an arm up to support your hips, and spread your legs a little further apart, then I move that lucky piece of cloth to one side and run my tongue from the very edge of your center all the way to your clit." A strangled gasp caught his attention, and he decided to move away from such a sensitive area. "Mmm, I was right angel, you do taste as good as you look. I slide up you body, sending your panties sliding to the floor as I do, I kiss you again, and you can taste yourself on my lips." 

"Mmm, Logan." 

"See, I told you that you tasted good." 

"Logan, do you have any idea what you're doing to me?" 

"Of course I do baby, I'm making love to you. Does that bother you? Do you want me to stop?" 

"No, but you're driving me crazy." 

"That's the point love, and by morning I promise that you'll view insanity in a much different light." 

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Well there you have it, my first published attempt at adult fiction. Hope you liked it. Either way, let me know, suggestions and comments are greatly appreciated. I shall post again soon, hopefully anyway. I plan on updating Broken next, then the final chapter of 12 Days, then the next chapter of this one. Up next, poetry, the bath, and the box. 

E-mail me off list if you like at: terisxenite@hotmail.com   
  



	4. Chapter 3

Just To Hold You 

Chapter 4 

Teris Xenite 

terisxenite@hotmail.com 

Author's Note and disclaimer: No I don't own them. If I did they'd still be able to touch (there were other ways to inject tension). I have to admit as much as I don't like it…the virus was a good one. But the shipper in me can't leave this alone…so here lies the story. Somehow I have the feeling that it will be one of many like this but hey gotta toss my two cents in. I hope you enjoy, review or no more posting shall occur (I tried not blackmailing I really did and my muse starved). And lastly the italicized words are thoughts, the bold italicized words are a characters counter thoughts while arguing with themselves. 

**********************************************************************************************   
"Logan, it's not that I don't appreciate what you're doing…I really do, but is there any chance we could skip the bath and go for whatever else you've got planed?" 

Logan paused for a moment considering her request. Although the idea of her screaming his name in the throes of passion greatly appealed to him, and turned him on like none other had ever before, he still didn't want her to feel that he valued her because he wanted to sleep with her. _No I don't think I'll risk it. Remember Cale…Patience is a virtue._ "As much as I like that idea Max I'm afraid that I'm gonna have to say no. The bath is an important part of the plan." 

"What plan?" 

"Well according to Joshua, Max and Logan gettin busy with it is the plan. I can't seem to find any fault with that." 

She knew Logan couldn't see her, but she still blushed at the husky tone his voice took on as he said those words. "Logan, we can't. You know that." Her words squeaked out in an anguished whisper. 

"In the conventional sense you're right Max. But there are a thousand ways to make love, and I'm sure that between the two of us that we can figure out how to make oh nine hundred and ninety nine of them work. But for now just trust me." 

"Alright." 

"Good, now get into your bath before it gets cold." He heard the soft splashing sounds of her entrance into the water and a soft sigh of pleasure as the water's warmth invaded her pores. "Comfy?" 

"Mh-hm." 

"Good." 

"Now what?" 

"Ever curious aren't you?" 

"Blame it on the feline DNA." 

"Now you lie back and relax, while I tell you how beautiful you are, and how much I love you. How much I missed you while you were gone." 

"Careful Logan, you keep talkin like that I might just end up with an ego like Alec's." 

"You inspire me Max, and give me the strength to do things that I never thought that I could." 

"Logan how could I inspire you? I'm a fucked up genetically engineered killing machine." 

"Max you are so much more than that. You're amazing…" Logan sighed trying to think of a way to convince her. "Max…I stopped writing poetry years ago…All of sudden I'd look at a blank page and for the life of me I couldn't fill it. Do you know what changed that?" 

"No, but somehow I think that you're gonna tell me." 

"I sat down one day thinking of you, and the words just flowed again." 

"Logan…I inspired one poem, that's great, but it doesn't make me your muse." 

"On the contrary Max. You've inspired enough poetry to be classified as a muse. In fact they're sitting right beside me…I was planning on reading one of them to you tonight." 

"Really?" Her tone seemed to say 'yeah right Logan…but I'm gonna know if you're lying just to make me feel better'. 

"Really…I've got them right here beside me." He paused and she heard a shuffling of papers on his side of the connections. He cleared his throat and began his declaration to her in a soft husky voice. 

_You are the star, Beloved, my moon and sun,_   
_My land and water, darkness, light and air._   
_All life was drab until you made it fair…_   
_Made life and love with beauty subtly one,_   
_Unconscious of the glory just begun_   
_With knowing you. Now I no longer care_   
_For anything in which you do not share._   
_Alas for me. This thing you have done_   
_Renders me deaf and dumb and wholly blind_   
_To everything in which you have no part…_   
_In my devotion only I exist_   
_Yours is my body, soul and quailing mind._   
_I have no eyes, nor lips, nor ears, nor heart-_   
_No will, no inclination to resist._

There were several moments of silence. Logan couldn't see them but matching trails of tears were running down her face. Finally Logan couldn't take it anymore. "Max?" When she didn't respond Logan panicked slightly. This wasn't like before, he couldn't see if she had started sizing or if something else had gone wrong. All he could rely on to guide him was her voice, and right now she was silent. He couldn't even hear her breathing. "Max? Are you alright? Is everything ok?" 

There was a moment's more silence and then a slight sniffling in the back ground. "Yeah Logan, everything's fine. That was beautiful." There was the sniffling sound again. 

"Max? Are you crying love?" 

"Yeah." 

"I'm sorry, I never meant to make you cry." 

"I know, but it's not your fault. For a long time I didn't even know how to cry, I didn't really know how to feel anything until I met you, and then when I finally learned how I decided to play the tough bad ass solider who didn't show pain or love. But you know, after spending three months at Manticore only to come home and find out that I can't have what I wanted most in the world…I think I earned the right." 

"You have. I would do anything to be able to turn back time, and make it so that you had no reason to cry Max, but I can't. I'd do anything to regain that year that we lost, but I can't. What I can do is promise you that we're gonna find a way through this. If I have to search the world over, threaten Lydecker and everyone else who ever even thought of being associated with Manticore. What ever it takes that's what I'm going to do, because I'm not giving up till you're in my arms." 

"You're just the eternal optimist aren't you?" 

"That's my nature." 

"Well in this case, I hope you're right." 

"You'll see everything will work out." There was a moments silence and Logan decided to skip ahead to the next part of the evening. "Do you mind cutting your bath short after all?" 

"Depends…will what I get in return be better than soaking until I'm all nice and pruny?" 

"That it will be…" 

"In that case…hang on a sec." Max ducked under the water to wash away the few remaining suds. Logan heard a soft slosh and splash as she rose from the water. "Alright. What now…" 

"Now dry yourself off, slowly though. Don't rush, we have all night." 

Max picked up the fluffy terry cloth and began rubbing it over her body. She went slowly as Logan had asked, gasping as the soft towel brushed over her sensitized breasts and inner thighs. The soft sound was still picked up over the speakers, and unknown to Max, Logan smiled as he heard it guessing the source. 

"Feel good sweetheart?" 

"You could say that…" 

"Good…now when you finish drying off there's a robe hanging on the back of the door for you." 

Max dropped the towel and slid into the soft satin robe. The cool satin brushed against her heated skin, bring another soft gasp to her lips. "Logan…" 

"Yes angel?" 

"What now, cause I'm fixin to lose my mind." 

"It won't be long now…take the box and follow the red rose petals." He heard the soft shuffling of her steps and the gasp of suprise as she opened the door. "Logan…this is beautiful." 

Max's normally spartan bedroom had been transformed into a sensualists paradise. There were rose petals sprinkled on the floor and bed, and candles lit around the room providing it with a soft glow. The bed itself had been transformed with satin sheets, soft feather pillows, and a flowing bedspread that looked to be a dark blue velvet. 

"You like it?" 

"Like it? Logan…this is incredible. The sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me." 

"It tops the case of motor oil? Right?" 

_Was that doubt in his voice? Damn…I really wanna kick his ex's ass now. How dare she make him doubt himself like that._ "Hell yeah…" 

"Well, that's a load off my mind, cause I just couldn't figure out how to get a case of motor oil delivered to your apartment before we got off the phone." 

"Don't you even think about trying to do that. This…this is wonderful Logan. More than I ever would have expected." 

"Nothing but the best will do for my girl." 

"Your girl huh? I like it, you're cute when you get all possessive." 

"I am not…" 

"Sure you are, I can just see you puffing your chest out from here." 

"Well I guess you've caught me, but it's your fault." 

"Really? How ya figure?" 

"I can't help it…I have the most beautiful woman in the world letting me call her mine…" 

"Most beautiful woman in the world?" 

"Without a doubt." 

"You are soooo getting lucky tonight. You should give Sketchy lessons, he might actually get a date." 

"But then I'd have to kill him…" 

"Why?" 

"Because, such knowledge in Sketchy's hands would be very, very dangerous." 

"I'll second that." 

"Besides it would be cruel to grant him such knowledge just before his death." 

"Really…" 

"Well he would inevitably hit on you, and after that death is normally instantaneous." 

"Yet you seem to do so constantly…got a death wish I don't know about?" 

"But don't you know? I like playing with fire." 

"Well I think you're safe, you can play with me any way you want." 

"Promise?" 

"Open your present and you'll find out." 

"I was wondering when we were going to get to that part?" Max plopped down on the bed and proceed to open the package in her lap with military precision. Inside she found two wrapped packages on top of a piece of card board shielding the rest from sight. "Logan, it isn't nice to tease. Which one do I open first?" 

"Open the smaller one first." She picked up the smaller box and slid the wrapping paper from it. _Oh shit it's a jewelry box. It can't be what I think it is…not now._ "Well, aren't you going to open it?" 

"How did you know that I hadn't?" 

"Trust me Max, when you open it I'll know." 

Max slowly opened the box, and she gasped when she saw what laid on the velvet inside. _His mom's locket. It's beautiful, but there's no way I can accept this._ "Do you like it?" 

Max open and closed her mouth several times before she could speak. "Logan it's beautiful, but your mom wanted you to have it to remember her by. I couldn't possibly…" 

"Max, she wanted me to remember her by seeing the woman I loved wearing it. Put it on." 

"Are you sure?" 

"More so than I've ever been in my life, put it on Max. I've been waiting my whole life to see you wear it." Max did as he asked gently fastening the chain around her neck. "It looks beautiful on you Max." 

"I love you." 

"I love you too. Please keep that in mind when you move the card board ok?" 

"Logan? Why do you sound so nervous?" 

"Because you're either going to like your gift or tell me off. One of the two. I'm hoping that if it's the later remembering that I love you will keep you from killing me." 

"Trust me Logan, I doubt you could do anything that would make me kill you. Unless there are pictures of you and Asha bangin the gong in that box." 

"Me and Asha? No….Why would that even cross your mind?" 

"I've seen the way she looks at you Logan…" 

"Kinda like Rafer and Alec look at you?" 

"Did you have to mention his name?" 

"Ok, ok. Rest assured there are no pictures of me and Asha, or me and anyone else in that box. So take the cardboard out ok?" 

"Ok." There was a moments silence, then a scraping sound as she moved the card board to expose the second layer of the box. There was more silence and then the exclamation. "You bought me SEX TOYS??" 

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Yes I know I'm an evil cliff-hanger writing bitch, review anyway. There are some plot twists planned for the next chapter. I'll be taking guesses on what they are (of my beta's no one's been able to guess yet). I'll also be taking votes for Max's reaction. If there is enough of a split I may write two chapters and an alternate ending. Oh and either way...banging the gong is coming up. 

Review or find me on the net at: terisxenite@hotmail.com.   



	5. Chapter 4

Just To Hold You 

Chapter 5 

Teris Xenite 

terisxenite@hotmail.com 

Disclaimer: No I don't own them. If I did do you REALLY think they'd have all this UST? I think not! 

Author's Note: And this chapter is deicated to Kat (katerpillar)...who told me the truth when the first version of this read like a cheep porno. And a special shout out to my buddy Sydney (Sydpanball22)...may your parents lose the bug up their ass soon...cause I'm missin my author buddy! And to Kimmy (iluvaqt) thanks for the advice ;). 

**Challenge: See if you can figure out how Logan's doing this without keeling over! Post your answer in your e-mail or review and if you guess write you'll get a walk on part in the next chapter ;). Sorry Kat, Sorry Syd...this doesn't apply to you two ;)**

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"Max…baby…I can explain." 

"Explain?" 

"We might not be able to make love in the conventional way at the moment. That doesn't mean that we don't have options and choices. We don't have to use any of them if they make you uncomfortable. You can give them to Cindy or Sketchy if you want to, it isn't the toys themselves that matter. I gave them to you to illustrate a point." 

"That you have a kinky side I didn't know about?" 

"No…more along the lines of we can still be together. We just have to be creative." 

"Creative as in?" 

"As in open your other present and I'll show you." 

"Logan…if this is some freaky sex thing…" 

"This isn't about sex, Max. It's about intimacy, it's about trust, and it's about love. If it was just sex I wanted I could easily find it elsewhere…and so could you. But I don't want that, I want you. You with all your hang ups, all your demons, and all your quirks. I would rather have one moment with you knowing that what we had was real, than have a happily ever after with anyone else." 

"Logan, you are just too damn good at that. It's not fair…I can't ever stay mad at you…" 

"And that's a bad thing how?" 

"Cause it's supposed to be like one of my skills…You know, you can hack, I can stay mad?" 

"True, but if you stay mad we don't get to make up." 

"Point taken…I think I'll find another skill." 

"I was hoping you were going to say that." 

"Hey Logan?" 

"Yeah?" 

"Wanna make up?" 

"But of course…I can promise you Max, it's very doubtful that I'll ever turn you down when you make an offer like that." Max laughed quietly, almost silently then. Normally that would make any man nervous, but somehow to Logan the sound of her laughter was an incredible turn on. Perhaps because he knew that if she was laughing, then she was smiling, and that if she was smiling he had made her happy. He vowed to make her laugh more often. "What's so funny?" 

"I just got the cutest picture of you shopping for these things…it's just I never pictured you as being anything but vanilla sex." 

"Well, with a few exceptions you're right. But you see…I wanna hear you screaming my name in the worst way…so I decided to improvise." 

"Improvise? Now you've got me curious…" 

"Open your last package." 

She hastily ripped the paper off of the box and lifted from it a soft, form fitting outfit, much like her cat suit. She looked at it quizzically for a moment, before reluctantly admitting that she had no earthly idea how this factored into sex. "Ah Logan? What is this?" 

"You'll see. For now put it on…you'll see what it does in a minute." 

"Ok…" Max stood letting the satin robe fall to the floor, then sliding into the suit and zipping it up. It covered more of her than her cat suit did, with attached gloves and toe socks. It came up high on her neck leaving her wondering even more intently what Logan had planned. "Alright, what now?" She said impatiently, she was ready to get the game underway. Months of simmering desire, combined with the earlier foreplay, the setting, and several of his comments, left her wanting far more than just pretty words. She wanted him…and she wanted him now. 

"You remember how I asked if you trusted me?" 

"Yes…" 

"Well this is where that comes in. I want you to lay back on the bed for me, and close your eyes ok?" 

"Alright…" 

"Now stay that way…don't move and don't open your eyes until I tell you. " 

She heard soft footsteps enter the room, but she was unsure who they belonged to. The foot steps stopped at the edge of the bed, and grasped one of her wrists lightly. They pulled it up slightly and then she heard a click, and felt cool metal circling her wrist. The same steps were followed on her other wrist and then each of her ankles. The hands gently touched her face and brushed her hair back. A soft covering came over her face, and she felt it stretch from her hair line to her chin then down to where the other part of the suit stopped. There were even individual pockets for her ears. She could breathe easily through the material, and didn't protest as it was secured in place by a zipper on the side. A final gentle caress to her face and the foot steps receded. 

She waited for the footsteps to return, and when they didn't she listened carefully for the sounds of another person in the room. The only breathing in the room was her own, and there were none of the subtle signals that even the quietest person would give off. She was alone. She wiggled her wrists and ankles slightly, testing her range of motion. She wasn't uncomfortable, and could still rest her arms on the pillow should she wish to. Logan had thought this out well. She waited as the silence lengthened. She felt vulnerable like this, and even though she knew he would never leave her in such a weak and embarrassing position she longed for the sound of his voice. 

Her heart quickened as his voice once again filled the room. "I'm sorry about the handcuffs, love. But I was afraid that the illusion would be shattered without them. Are you comfortable? Do you want me to stop?" 

"Logan, you better not stop now…it's not nice to be a tease ya know." 

"Alright…but if you want me to stop…at anytime you tell me, ok?" 

"Will do…Now care to let me in on why I'm trussed up like a Christmas turkey?" 

"So that it'll be easier for me to do this." All of a sudden Max felt a weight on her chest and warm breath at her neck. Phantom arms pulled her close and placed a soft kiss upon her lips, and then were suddenly gone. She gasped in suprise and started to question him, but before she could she felt his touch on her stomach and legs. 

"How? Logan, we can't…I can't lose you. Not now." 

"I know, but don't worry, we're safe. Completely and totally safe." 

"How can you say that? How do you know? I love you Logan, and I want to touch you. But not if it means losing you." 

"Max…trust me. I'm safe. You can't hurt me…I'll explain the how's and why's later. For now just trust me, and enjoy ok?" He punctuated his request with gentle caresses to her already sensitized breasts, making her moan in answer as he brushed against her nipples with his fingers. "Can you do that for me love?" 

"Keep touching me like that, and I can do any damn thing you want me to." 

His good natured chuckle reached her ears, and a gentle kiss was deposited on her neck. "Well I'll just have to hold you to that, because I plan on touching you like this all night long." 

His lips found her's, and he kissed her gently while still caressing her breasts. She felt his tongue softly probing, requesting entrance to explore the nooks and crannies of her mouth. Unsure of how this could possibly work with a layer of fabric between them but unable to deny him, she opened for him. Miraculously he was able to kiss her, and she was able to feel the warmth of his tongue caress hers. 

This pleasant exploration continued until she was flushed and breathless, and then he pulled away leaving a trail of open mouthed kisses and warm breath in his wake. His mouth fixed on her neck he trailed his hands down her sides and over her stomach making her shiver. "Ticklish?" 

"Just a little." 

"I'll have to remember that." He kissed her again, running his hands up her arms gently caressing her palms and each individual finger. He drew his hands slowly back down, and kissed her from the edge of her mouth up to her ear. "You're so very beautiful angel. Do you have any idea how much I love you?" He nibbled on her earlobe as she fought to keep from losing control. He'd barely touched her in places she never would have thought of as erogenous zones and she was already ready to plead with him to take her. 

"I think I'm starting to get the idea…but I'm a bit of a slow learner. Maybe you should show me again?" 

"With pleasure love." He kissed and bit down to her neck as he traced maddeningly slow circles on her stomach. He trailed his tongue over her pulse and across the ridges of her collar bone enjoying the way she jumped in response to his touch. Then he latched onto her breast, worrying the nipple with gentle sweeps of his tongue. Her hips began to jump as he alternated sucking and breathing over her pleasantly swollen and worried crests. 

"Logan…you're driving me crazy…I never knew…I could…feel like this…Like I've never seen the sky before...like I want to vanish inside your kiss...and that with each day I'm loving you more and more."   
  
He kissed her again, with such passionate intensity that she thought the heat of it would burn her. He continued kissing her until the need for oxygen forced him from her. "Max…I love you more than I ever thought was possible…and never…ever will I let you go." He kissed her again, gently this time, almost reverently. Then he sucked at her neck giving into his instinctual urge to mark her as his mate. He brushed his hand across her cheek, before kissing her again. "You are the most wonderful thing in my life…The sun…The moon…The stars…Everything pales in comparison to you." 

She gasped and opened her mouth to speak, only to be silenced by a passionate kiss. "Enough talking, I want to show you how I feel. How much I love you…" He stroked her cheek with one hand, and traced her barcode with the other, as he gave her a kiss that was the expression of bittersweet love far too long denied. He smiled as her breath came faster…_So beautiful…so perfect…so passionate…and she wants me._

She whimpered as he pulled away from the kiss, but was not disappointed for long as he returned to his earlier worship of her breasts, and traced a path from her stomach down to her knees. He moved his hand teasingly up her inner thighs and let his hand hover over her soft curls. He could feel her heat, and it was slowly driving him insane. He almost surrendered his earlier plans of gentle seduction until she came screaming his name, but resolved to be strong. 

Max had other ideas however, she'd had enough of gentle and slow during the year they'd danced around each other. She wanted him, and she damn well intended on letting him know it. She circled her hips bringing his hand in contact with her body, ending his hesitation. "You want something Max?" 

"Yes…Touch me Logan…Please, we wasted so much time before. Waiting for the perfect moment that never came…" 

"I know love…I know…" He kissed her, with a gentle intensity that soon built to passion. He pulled her close and gasped as his erection brushed against the warm temptation that was her body. He continued kissing her, swallowing her moans and gasps greedily with his tongue as he reached down and stoked her clit. He slowly slid a finger inside of her loving the gasp of suprise and longing that the action incited. He slid another in using the circling of her hips as he stroked her clit to provide a maddeningly gentle friction. 

Soon his world narrowed to the warmth of her skin, the sound of her moaning his name, and the sight of her wanting him. The hand cuffs started to rattle against the bed posts as she shuddered against him and he pressed her to the mattress more firmly with his free hand. His fingers moved in and out of her body with ease now, but she still wasn't ready for him to come inside to play quite yet. "Max…you don't have to answer this question, and no matter what I'll love you , but how often have you done this?" 

"Only once or twice when I wasn't in heat. Why do you ask…" 

"You're pretty tight here…" He said moving his fingers inside her to demonstrate. He couldn't help but grin as she gasped. "Which meant that either you hadn't had a whole lot of experience, or you were really nervous, and I wanted to know which was the case so I'd know what to do now." 

"Do I even want to ask how you know that?" 

"Not unless you're in the mood to hear a funny, slightly kinky bedtime story…" 

"Tell me later…" She paused for a moment. "Is it a problem?" She asked barely keeping her voice from betraying her insecurity. She couldn't bare for him to find fault in her…not here…not like this. 

"Max, you really have to ask that?" He kissed her softly and caressed her cheek, loving how she turned her face into his caress. "No, it's not a problem…Just means that we'll have to have a little bit more foreplay the first few times, and that I'll have to be a little more careful until you get used to me. I won't hurt you…I promise." 

"Logan, I already know that…I trust you, remember." Hearing those words from her sent a powerful wave of protectiveness over him. He forsook words for once, choosing to convey his feelings with kisses and caresses instead. His kisses started out gentle, making her feel treasured and precious, then progressed steadily towards mind blowing passion. 

All the time he had kissed her, his fingers had been matching the tempo of his explorations with her nether regions. By the time he moved his lips from hers he had her moaning his name, awash in the sensations radiating from where his fingers caressed her. He had ceased kissing her so that he could fulfill his earlier promise to himself. He did want to hear her scream for him. 

He caressed her clit with circular motions of his thumb while rocking his fingers back and forth inside of her. Her hands grasped the bed posts tightly as she moaned both his name and God's, and told him with whimpers, gasps, and sighs just how much she was enjoying his attentions. Her body gripped him tighter as the first waves of her climax hit her, and she breathlessly begged him not to stop. He answered her call with an even more aggressive, though still gentle, rendition of the same, and continued to build her up until she did indeed scream his name as her body griped his fingers and she saw stars dancing before her eyes. 

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The end? Yeah right! Next chapter will be coming up very soon...Hope ya'll enjoyed this one. 

Review or find me on the net at: terisxenite@hotmail.com. 

And remember, a walk on part goes to the first person to figure out how Logan's doing this without contracting the virus... 


	6. Chapter 5

Just To Hold You 

Chapter 6 

Teris Xenite 

terisxenite@hotmail.com 

Disclaimer: No I don't own them. If I did do you REALLY think they'd have all this UST? I think not! Do you think I would have canceled it...hmm lemme think. **HELL NO!**

Author's Note: And this chapter is dedicated to Kat, Sydney, Kimmy, and Jenna. 

You'd have gotten this sooner, but I got locked out of my account for a week. Other updates will follow shortly. In the future I'd like to ask that if there is a problem with one of my stories, please contact me before going over my head. It's likely an oversight that I'll gladly change, as this one was. 

I, like all of you, am deeply saddened by the cancellation of Dark Angel and feel that it was a mistake on Fox's part. However I do believe that if we stay strong in the struggle we shall receive our ending. 

To join in the fight visit : Dark Angel Nation 

To sign the petition to get Dark Angel renewed visit : We Want Season Three Petition   


Side note to the notes that follow, I don't mean to embarrass you by calling on you in a public forum but you didn't leave a way to contact you and I'd like to respond to the things you've said. 

Angelbebe: I said reviews were what encouraged me to post, they are. I will always write, because as you said writers can not help themselves, they write because they must. It's not always easy, but still. Now as for the self esteem deal...You're right, I should have more of it. But since my first experience with showing someone my work resulted in them telling me that the sucked and they didn't know why I even bothered and that it was a shame to waste trees to print my crappie work on...Well I have a slight issue with believing that people WANT to see what I've written. I'm working on it, and some day I won't need reviews to gauge the quality of my work, for the moment I do. 

Becky and Carolyn : Thank you for your kind reviews, they always lift my day. I wish you'd leave an e-mail so I could send you a e-card or something :). 

JessicaMackenzie: Thanks for your comments. While I doubt that I will change any of my characterizations in the 12 Days based on your opinions, I am thankful for your feedback. If the grammar and punctuation bothers you, feel free to check a chapter and send it to me off list. And I'll gladly consider making corrections, as I know that nether are my strong suit and the story was unbetaed. 

To all of you who have reviewed any of my stories: Thank you. Your feedback brightens my day and inspires me. 

Now after the longest author's note in the history of mankind here's the story. 

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He continued caressing her, abet more slowly now than he had been only moments before. As her breathing began to slow and she came back to herself, he kissed her. Not a passionate kiss, like the one that he'd given her earlier, but a soft, tender declaration of love. "I love you Max. Come what may, I will love you until my dying day." 

"Which damn well better be when we're both old and gray, or I swear I'm gonna kick someone's ass." 

Logan chuckled low and deep in his chest, and she pictured the grin her words had brought to his face. "I think I can agree with that." A soft kiss landed on her cheek, and a warm hand was spread over her belly. She could feel him against her to the left, and guessed that he had rolled onto his side. His breath landed warm on her neck as he slowly moved his hand up and down from her chin to just past her belly button. His gentle repetitive touch lulled her to the cusp of sleep, and just before she fell over the edge she whispered her love. 

She awoke to the feel of satin against her skin. The handcuffs had been removed, and to her disappointment the bed beside her was empty and cold. She could have almost believed that it never happened, and that it had only been a dream. That is she could have, had rose petals not still littered her floor and had her bed not been sheathed in satin and lace. In Logan's stead she found a red rose on the pillow. He had removed the suit she'd worn earlier, and placed her instead in a night gown a thousand times more soft and feminine than anything she'd ever owned. 

She stretched for a few moments, enjoying the sheer comfort of her surroundings. As much as she hated to admit it…Alec had been right all those times that he'd sworn she wouldn't be so damn hostile if she'd just get laid once and a while. She honestly couldn't imagine anything getting on her nerves today, nothing could phase her. Not after last night. But it wasn't just the physical, even though she did feel better than she had since they'd first discovered the virus. For the first time sense that night she felt at peace, and she was sure that no matter how bad things got she and Logan could handle it. 

_Speaking of Logan, where the hell is he? I wanna know how he did that, and if it's possible to do the same thing for him. _ She blushed as she remembered the wanton way she had screamed for him the night before, and the uninhibited way that she'd responded to his touch. There had been no restraint, there had been no hiding, and there most certainly had been no holding back when it came to feelings. _Never in my life have I let go like that…I guess what they say is true…sex is different when you're with someone you love._

Finally she got out of bed to go searching for Logan, and the answers to her questions. Instead of finding him as she'd hoped, she found a laden breakfast tray on her counter. Upon closer inspection she found a crystal vase on the tray for her rose, and that the cell phone from the night before was sitting beside it with a note. _Enjoy breakfast in bed, and please call me when you wake up. Love, Logan_ She carried the tray back to her room, settling back into bed, and pulling the covers around her. Then she turned on the cell phone and dialed his number. As the phone rang she picked up the rose from her pillow and placed it in the vase. 

She heard him pick up the phone and then a rustling of sheets before his voice husky with sleep filled her senses. "Allo…" 

"Expensive gifts, surprise late-night visits, over-the-top flattery. Do you always come on this strong?" She smiled as she thought of the changes in both of them since the last time she'd spoken those words to him. 

"Only when I meet someone I have to know everything about. " His reply was the same as it had been then, but this time it carried no subterfuge. 

"You better be careful Logan, a girl could get used to this." 

"As long as you're the girl Max, I can deal with that." 

"Didn't we discuss that already? I thought I made it pretty damn obvious last night, but just in case you need to hear it again…I love you…I want you…and I don't think I could live without you." 

Tears pooled in Logan's eyes, he knew Max loved him. Of that there was no doubt, but still there was a multitude of meaning in those words. She was choosing to speak them now…of her own will, in his prescience, while not faced with death or disaster. That meant more to him than any gift he had ever received. "Do you mind putting off breakfast for a few minutes?" 

"That depends…what's my motivation?" 

"I want to make love to you again." 

"In that case, to hell with breakfast. How do we do this?" 

"I left your suit folded by the end of the bed, put it on for me? The hood too, if you want me to be able to kiss you." 

"Alright, but I gotta ask, are you ever gonna clue me in on how this bitch works?" 

"After your reaction to those toys I got you I'm not entirely sure I want to tell you." 

"Logan….please…." She turned her voice in a breathy whisper and practically moaned his name. She heard him gasp, and felt the heat in her rising to the occasion. She'd never really acted like this, except when she was in heat. She never tried to turn a man on when she wasn't on a mission, and even then she normally didn't have or want to. But she was discovering more and more that she liked to turn Logan on. She liked to hear him gasp, she liked to hear him moan, and she absolutely loved hearing him grit her name out between his teeth. 

Logan did indeed gasp, and feel blood began to make a very swift detour south of the border when Max turned her voice into passion personified. "You're an evil woman Max Guevera. A truly evil woman." 

"And you love me for it…" She smirked, and a self satisfied tone crept into her voice as she spoke. She was finding her old attitude making a resurgence after last night. "Don't you?" 

"You know I do…" There was a moments silence, and then he asked. "Are you ready yet?" 

"Logan…I was born rea--" Max's words trailed off as sensation blazed from her breasts, to the places within her that Logan had laid claim to last night. Her eyes drifted shut, and her jaw clenched as it suddenly felt as if he was caressing her everywhere, turning her inside out. "Logan??" 

"Ah ah ah, play with fire and you're gonna get burned Maxie…I wanna hear you scream for me again." 

"You gonna make me?" She asked playfully. Suddenly she felt his lips descend upon her neck and his fingers tracing paths across her inner thighs. "Logan…I don't know how you're doing this, and I don't care at the moment, but you damn well better not stop now." 

"I wouldn't dream of it Max." He kissed her collar bone and traced the ridges with his tongue, then danced over her hammering pulse. "I know this isn't the most conventional way of making love, but it does let us do some of the things that I know I've been wanting to do for the longest time." 

"Really…" She gasped. "Like what?" 

"Mmmm…" There was a nipping at her neck. "Like make you moan…hearing you scream for me." He kissed her, hard and fast until she was breathless. She knew that he wasn't there, but it felt so real. And the warm tones of his voice made her give into the temptation to just close her eyes and go with it. Her eyes drifted shut, and she became focused solely on his phantom hands, and the feelings they were enticing from her. "Max, I'll never be able to tell you how much I love you. Never, even if I try for a thousand years. There just aren't enough words for it…" 

"Then show me…" 

"With pleasure love." His lips found hers once again, as his hands roamed her body driving her insane. His kiss was deep, and drugging and drove her even further towards the edge. He swallowed her gasps as his hands toyed with her breasts, then he abandoned her lips as he found other parts of her to explore. Her moans and whimpers fueled a primitive fire deep within him, and drove him onward. He sought to claim her, brand her as his, mark her as his mate. He bit her neck, then sucked the pain from it with the warm caresses of his mouth. 

She gasped and thrust upwards into his touch. "God Logan, that feels incredible." He smiled, and repeated the action further down her neck. Her approval was very apparent as her words of praise deteriorated to mindless reaction to pleasure. No one had ever been able to accuse Logan of not paying attention when he had a beautiful woman in his bed. He marked down in his memory that Max liked it when he used his teeth. No scratch that. He though as she moaned again. She likes it a lot. 

He stopped then, and his voice bridged the gap between sensation for her. "You like that don't you Max?"   
He let his fingertips graze her sides and trace over her ribs. He listened in satisfaction as she gasped and had to try to slow her rapid breathing to answer him. He was teasing her, and he knew it. But he promised himself that he'd make it up to her in spades later. After so much of his life being out of his control, he needed to hear her acknowledge that he was pleasing her. 

"Logan…if you can't tell that I like it when you go all possessive on me, then we gotta work on your awareness of your surroundings. It's a shame too, cause it's going to require lots of long…hard… intensive…hands on…interactive training." 

He kissed her again, before she could continue, and the passionate exchange continued until both were breathless. He pulled away and she could hear the wicked grin in his voice. "Promise?" 

"Keep playin me like that, and you can bet your sweet ass I promise." Her words once again trailed off into the incoherent range as he clapped his teeth clapped on her stomach and then trailed love bites farther down. He used his fingertips to gently trace figure eight's on the delicate skin of her inner thigh and the creases between her legs and body. 

"As much as you like being nibbled love, I think it might be a better idea to try a little something different here." He began scraping his finger nails lightly against her skin as he trailed over it, and brought his unshaven cheek to nuzzle her. Then he followed the same pattern with feather light kisses. She could swear that she could feel his smile in the room, and that it grew wider the more she responded to him. 

"Logan, that feels wonderful, but what about you?" Max was having a hard time thinking through the haze of pleasure that he'd created around her. But she wanted him to be happy, to receive pleasure from this too, and so far it had been all about her. She ceased to be concerned when he kissed her again, this time with the intention of showing her the pleasure he derived simply by being with her. 

"Max one look, one kiss, one whisper from you means more to me than anything else in life ever could." He kissed her again, and continued to stroke her smooth skin maintaining her arousal. "Being with you completes me Max." He placed a feather light kiss at her temple, and nuzzled her neck. 

"Logan, that's one of the sweetest things anyone's ever said to me. But when this is over, you better believe that I'm gonna blow your mind." 

"I'll look forward to it, but for the moment I think I'll go treasure hunting." 

"Treasure hunting?" 

He moved his hand forward a bit and let it dwell over her clit for a few seconds before moving his fingers over it lightly. She gasped, moaned, and moved against him. "See, right there, there's a pearl…" He continued caressing her, loving the sounds that came from deep with in her throat. He slid two fingers into her, and moved them back and forth over what he believed to be her g-spot. His guess was proved right as she gasped and shuddered against him. _Well, I think it's safe to save I found gold._ Her body clenched around his fingers, and he got the pleasure oh hearing her moan his name as her bliss overwhelmed her. 

"Logan that was…wow…" Her one complaint was that she couldn't see him or touch him, other than that everything was perfect. She paused for a moment and sank into her bed in exhaustion. "How did you do that?" 

"Take off the hood Max." He said softly, almost regretting that the secret had to be revealed. 

Max did as he asked, and found herself reminded that he hadn't truly been there in the first place when she saw nothing but an empty room. "Logan…how did you do that?" 

"Well you see…It's like this…" 

**********************************************   
That's all folks. And yeah I know I said I was gonna explain in this chapter...but then you'da had to wait at least another week or maybe even more....and I didn't want that. 

Feedback is appreciated. I'm not asking for it this chapter, or holding the next update till I get it. Instead go to the addy's at the top of the page, and e-mail Fox. Let them know we want our show back. Write a story if you're so inclined. But please don't let our characters die. And don't let them go without a fight. I end with two quotes. 

Do not go gentle into that good night,   
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;   
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.   
- - -Dylan Thomas 

"All that is needed for evil to triumph is for good   
men to do nothing."   
----Edmund Burke 

To join in the fight visit : Dark Angel Nation 

To sign the petition to get Dark Angel renewed visit : We Want Season Three Petition 

As always I'm available off list at: terisxenite@hotmail.com 


	7. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters or the premise of Dark Angel, James Cameron/20th Century Fox does. Although after tonight's episode (Furgetaboudit), I wish I did because that fight scene is the coolest! Please don't sue me. I'll return them, no money do I make. I'll even make you cookies as a show of my appreciation.

  
Just To Hold You  
  
Chapter Six  
  
by  
  
Teris Xenite  
  


Author's Note: This chapter is dedicated to Michelle Drake, a very talented writer, and great sounding borad, my best boo Kimmy (iluvaqt), who's always there to encourage me and hear me out, and Erica (Acire Fox), who patiently listens to me talk about this stuff even though she has no idea what I'm talking about most of the time. Also a shout out to my buddy Ryan who spent three hours in a conversation about the mechanics of the suit, only to have me explain it in three sentances.

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"So you meant to tell me that microscopic nanosites were released into my blood stream when I turned on the suit, and they created sensations by manipulating my body's electrical system…"

"That's the short version, yes." 

"So how do you tell the nanosites what to do?"

"I slipped on a master suit, and the sites monitored my brain waves to figure out what I want them to do, and where."

"So they picked up on the brain activity in your imagination, and then transferred the sensations that you were imagining to me?"

"Yes…"

"I have a question?"

"Ok…"

"Where on earth did you find this thing?"

"Well before the Pulse, Seattle had a very active BDSM community."

"BDSM? What's that"

"Well…the letters stand for bondage, domination, sado-machiosm. But it's more of a lifestyle. You know the leather and whips kinda stuff you always hear people talking about?"

"You mean the kinky sex stuff…"

"Yeah…those are the ones. Well they had a very large following in Seattle." 

"And this became a good thing for us how?"

"I'm getting there…So anyway there were a lot of wealthy dominates, who were always looking for new ways to find sexual pleasure. One of their biggest complaints was that they couldn't always take their 'slaves' with them. They wanted a way to pleasure or punish their partners from long distances, and they wanted it to be discreet, easy to carry on business trips, and very realistic. So they hired a scientist to work on the job. He created the suits, and they became immensely popular."

"Which still doesn't lead us to how you got your hands on one."

"Well, Uncle Jonas was one of the beginning investors for the suit's creation. I contacted one of his old buddies, told him what I was interested in and he was happy to set me up with what I needed."

"How did you know about this in the first place?"

"Uncle Jonas tried to initiate me into his boys club when I turned 18. He…well there really isn't any other way to put it. He gave me a girl to play with…literally." 

Max was silent. "Really…and what kinda playing was going on here?" 

"Relax, nothing happened. I kept her with me long enough to keep her from getting into trouble, and then I sent her back. I'm sure she probably never told Jonas that I'd turned her away, but I think he knew because he never mentioned her again. He did take me on a tour of some of the hunting retreats though, and that's where I remembered the guy I contacted from."

"Ok…" 

"I know it's a little bit odd, but I was getting kinda desperate. It felt like I was losing you, and I couldn't stand to do that again."

"I have only one question for you Logan…"

"What's that?"

"When do I get to try this thing on you?"

"Ah…well that's going to be a little difficult."

"Why?"

"Because the only control suit I could get a hold of was designed for a master…not a mistress." There was a catch in her voice that let her know that there was something more that he wasn't saying. 

"Alright, we'll see what I can do to work around that. Sounds like there's something else that you're not telling me though."

"It's…Well…I…"

"Logan, whatever it is you can tell me."

"I know…It's just…Well embarrassing I guess…"

"Logan…we've had our share of embarrassing chats remember? The whole feline DNA makes me go into heat thing comes to mind. Whatever it is, you can tell me and I promise that I won't think any less of you or laugh or anything else like that ok?"

"Well the truth is, it'd be hard for you to use the suit on me. As low as my injury is…it's still far enough up to make things really dicey when it comes to sex, and I couldn't feel the sensations below my waist anyway."

"So that means that emotion, sight, and sound are more important than the physical? Right?"

"That's pretty much the case yes."

"Alright…I'll supply the emotion and the sound, you help me out with the sight."

"What?" Logan asked in a puzzled tone.

"I mean close your eyes Logan, and listen to my voice while I tell you how much I love you. How much I adore you, and how much I want you."

"So we're back to conventional phone sex."

"Pretty much…Is that ok with you?"

"Yes, but…" He trailed off. 

"But what Logan?"

"But you don't have to…I mean I wouldn't…I don't want-"

"Me to feel obligated to just because you did?"

"Right."

"Logan, that's precisely why I want to do this. Not because I feel obligated too, or because I want to pay you back, but because I love you and I want to share that love with you now like you just did with me. That you care enough about me to do what you just did, not wanting anything in return…It just makes me love you more, and I want to show you."

"Max--"

"Logan, do you want me?" 

"You know I do angel, more than anything."

"Then stop talking, and get comfortable. Because I want to love you all night long."

************************************

End Note: As always comments and reviews are greatly appreciated, as are efforts to keep DA alive. A side note to all strictly M/L shippers though, I hear a lot of complaints about everyone writing M/A shipper fic, or Logan bashing. Well, there is something you can do about that, be more vocal. Every M/L writer I know has noted a sharp drop in reviews, and that's discouraging for anyone. So if you want continued Max and Logan fixes, review those that do write the M/L fics. Because right now, while the Max and Alec fans may not be more numerous, they are most certainly louder.  
  
Visit: http://adinfinit.net/danation/   
or  
http://www.petitiononline.com/save3da/petition-sign.html   
  
These sites are great places to go if you're into Dark Angel and want it back.   
  
Also Kimmy and I have started a new message board for all you Lydecker fans out there. Please stop by: http://deck.proboards10.com/index.cgi  
  
As always I'm avaiable by e-mail at: terisxenite@hotmail.com. Peace Out.


	8. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters or the premise of Dark Angel, James Cameron/20th Century Fox does. As they horrifically abuse good science fiction shows in their care I question their worthiness, but worthy or not they own it. No money was made from this fiction.

Author's Note: This chapter is dedicated to Kimmy (iluvaqt), who I haven't spoken with in a while but always think on warmly, Erica (Acire Fox), who patiently listens to me talk about this and everything else under the sun. Also a shout out to my buddy Ryan who spent three hours in a conversation about the mechanics of the suit, and always lends a supportive ear when I can't figure things out and like the others mentioned is just an all round awesome person. This chapter so far as I can tell finishes up this story. I hope ya'll enjoy. Hopefully my other DA fics will be receiving the same treatment soon.

* * *

Just To Hold You

Chapter Seven

Teris Xenite

Max heard small rustling sounds, and then the soft groan of his mattress as he lowered himself onto it. "Are you all settled in Logan?" She heard his voice hitch as she adopted what she thought of as the sex kitten voice. She wouldn't have been able to do this a year ago, she wouldn't have known how, or cared enough about anyone to go this far to secure their pleasure without her own. But that had changed since she had met Logan, and it was time that she let him know it. "Are you ready Logan? Do you want me to love you?"

"God yes."

"Lay back and close your eyes Logan." She paused a minute, and waited for him to comply. "You know one of the best things about having genetically engineered senses Logan? I can smell you, from miles away. Not just the aftershave, or the soap, but you. I love the way you smell Logan, it makes me crazy, makes me want to touch you. It feels like I'm in heat, but better because I know that it's really me that wants-" She paused for a moment. She was comfortable with Logan, she trusted Logan, but it was still hard to go from 'we're not like that' to screaming 'I want to fuck you blind' in six seconds or less.

Logan either sensing that she was floundering or desperate to find out what she wanted whispered to her in a voice made husky by both need and emotion. "What do you want Max?"

"I want you Logan, all of you. Always. I want to rip your clothes off and fall into bed with you. I want to show how much fun sex can be when one of you can hold their breath for twenty minutes. I want to scratch my nails down your back and hear you groan. I want to see if that little spot where your neck meets your shoulder tastes as good as I think it does or if it's better. I want to make love with you until we're both so tired that we can't anymore. I want to fall asleep in your arms, and start all over again when we wake up. I want to hear you whisper my name when you come."

"Oh Max…" Logan's voice hitched on her name turning her on even more than her imaginings of him crying it out in passion had.

"Oh god Logan just like that, I want to hear you moan for me while I swallow you whole. They enhanced all of my senses Logan I can taste you too. Every time you fed me, and I made that face you loved it wasn't the food I tasted Logan, it was you. Just what was left of you on the spoon made me hot, when we kissed I thought I was going to combust. I never wanted to let you go."

"God me neither Max.

"I think of you touching me all the time, I have ever since I met you. I'd go riding my baby and feel it shake and tremble beneath me and I'd wish that I were riding you instead. I'd wish that it was you trembling beneath me." More arrested gasps and whimpers. Well she thought I'm on the right track then. Then she proceeded to scour the recesses of her mind for every single dirty thought that she'd ever had about Logan. This could very well be a very long conversation.

"When I'd zip up my catsuit I'd imagine that you were watching me and waiting for me at home when I got back from those missions of yours to help me get back out of it." This time her breath hitched and she caught her lip between her teeth. "Every time I zipped that suit up I'd imagine how your hands would feel skimming over me close as skin, helping me take it off. Every time I thought of that I ached for you Logan." Max suppressed a shudder as she imagined Logan's hands on her again before continuing.

"And that time that I cooked you dinner, you'll never know how hard it was for me not to storm out of that shower and drag you in their with me. Your scent was all around me, and I could hear your breathing and your heart beat from the other room. I wanted to see if they'd hitch if I straddled you and had my wicked, wicked way with you."

"Oh god Max I wish you had. I tried to skip dinner because I didn't think I could keep my hands off of you." Max's breathing quickened.

"I love the way that you watch me when we play chess, you're always so focused and your stare is so intense. Your eyes are so beautiful Logan, I could fall into them. I want to drown in them, watch them get darker in passion, watch them burn as you come inside me. I ache to feel you in me Logan, I swell to think of you inside me, to have you touch me." "I want to wrap my hand around you, feel you quiver and watch you gasp for me. I want to grab hold of you and play with you till you think you can't take it anymore. Then I want to lick you, give into to my feline instincts and suck you dry just so that I can walk around with the taste of your come and smell of you on me all day long."

"Oh god Max…Max. Love you…" Several more exclamations filled the air between them, and then all that could be heard was heavy breathing.

No one could have ever told Max that she'd be more proud of talking a man to an orgasm than she was of being able to kick ass and take names. Maybe this was what Kendra had always meant when'd she'd mentioned how awesome it was to be a woman, maybe it was because it was her man. But for whatever the reason she felt pretty damn awesome at the moment. "So intellectual orgasms aren't possible huh?" She had to tease him just a little bit.

"I stand corrected. You can prove it to me anytime you feel like it." Logan panted trying to regain control of his breathing. "And Max…when we find that damn cure, you're not leaving my bed for at least a month, because I didn't realize it was possible, but you just made me want you even more."

"A whole month huh?"

"At least, as soon as I get my hands on you I'm going to worship every single inch of you starting at the top of your head and work my way all the way down to your toes. Then I'm going to start over again…maybe twice."

"Manticore had this really great concept called incentive Logan…as soon as we find that cure I'm going to do every single last thing that I just talked about…saving the world be damned."

Max grinned as she heard Logan's breath hitch over the phone. Kendra and Original Cindy were right, it was awesome to be female, and men were easy. And with that thought she started whispering in Logan's ear all over again.

* * *

AN: Thanks for reading. It's been a long journey to get this fic written and I hope that it brings as much joy to the folks reading as it did the one writing. Peace out, and as always reviews rock my world. 


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